I've been running the numbers and if I get custody of both of my kids, I cannot make all of my bills. My credit card debt is at $11K and $9K of that is lawyer fees. (not directly but I've been paying bills with my CC cards and paying cash to the lawyer) And, if I get custody of my kids, I can't work any overtime.

Anyhow, the good news, if you want to call it that, if I cut out my CC payments, it frees up about $300 a month. This money could be used for day care and other things.

I'm sure there's been guys in my situation with similar problems. Just looking for advice outside the box. What options do I have?

i had roughly 10K in credit card debt post divorce. i got it paid off in about 12 months. i don't get support and could only work OT when she had her parenting time. i just lived frugal for that year. i just went 'dave ramsey' on my debt. it's amazing what you can save if you only purchase necessities. we didn't eat out that much but we replaced it with fun stuff like cooking together. the kids never even noticed. i doubt yours will either. also maybe you'lll get a little CS when you get your kids. that could help a bit too. did you CS drop now that you got your son?

I still don't know if I actually got him or not. I have to wait for the order, which should come next week. The judge wasn't very clear after NJ lost her mind.

I see a common thread here. Guys often trade time with their kids for money, or the NJ doesn't make enough to pay CS.

In my case, I have been basically broke for the last 5 years because I choose to spend time with my kids. I have altered my lifestyle accordingly. I actually stayed in a hostel for $12 bucks a night on my last business trip because I didn't have the money for a hotel, even though the company reimburses me.

Its called sacrifice and its good for you. Spend $200 bucks a month for food for you and the kids. Never go out to eat. Forget dating. Take your kids to free stuff like parades and events, etc. I know my kids are worth it. I'm a little bitter that NJ takes about 40% of my income while I care for the kids, but I know that money isn't everthing. Trade your income for happiness.

Not sure we're on the same page here. I said I would be willing to default on my CC cards to spend more time with my kids instead of working overtime.

Usually the party getting custody gets CS per state guideline. Your ex hold down gainful employment? Also, you can ask for split in child care costs.

Just get the custody first though. You're over analyzing. If you try to figure out the next three, four five things in this system, your head will explode.

i wasn't suggesting he tie time w/ his kids to money. i think everyone here knows that is a poor plan. but in a previous thread he mentioned he got custody of his son. so it would stand to reason that his CS is adjusted appropriately. his question was how to pay down CC debt, my point was his CS should drop based on custody and since he can't work the OT to spend more time with them then that money could come from his CS reduction.