DadsDivorce.com provides essential information and resources about divorce, alimony, child support and child custody to men and fathers at any stage of divorce.

Are You Sure You’re Not Depressed?

Most men will experience temporary periods of downheartedness or imbalance in their lives during the divorce process and for a period of time once the divorce is final.  Experiencing long periods of downheartedness or imbalance can be dangerous to their health, be destructive to their relationships and can negatively affect their job performance

How do you know when you've crossed from bouts with downheartedness to depression?

by Richard J. Avdoian, MS, MSW, CSP

In the course of a divorce, we are often hurt by others and by ourselves through our self-doubt. Holding in hurt feelings for months in some cases years, is stressful, can cause minor and major illnesses and result in a very dysfunctional life.

Learning to forgive, get over it and make a decision to move forward is an important part of reclaiming a healthy life.

Stuck in Crisis Mode

Small hurtful comments or situations are typically easy to laugh off or process with little aftermath reaction.  But there are hurts that we experience that are so unfair, unforeseen, deeply felt that we retreat and we get “stuck in crisis mode” we choose not to forgive the person(s) who caused the situation that created the hurt.

Richard J. Avdoian, MS, MSW, CSP

The mainstream media and marriage and family therapist acknowledge that the divorce journey is both a physical and emotional experience for women but little is said about how divorce affects men. 

Alone Time: Generally, once the formal paperwork is completed, submitted and served, men become isolated often by their “choosing,” the distancing of friends, co-workers, family members and their children. This may be because historically men are left to internalize their emotions, fears & concerns.  It is not been, and still is not, commonplace for men to voice their emotional feelings and thoughts. The fear of being ridiculed and ostracized can be paralyzing.  This is unfortunate because men do struggle with emotional and mental issues, concerns and fears.  The problem that men face, is how to share and deal with these issues.

Feelings of powerlessness and a desire to regain power often lead the alienator to use any means necessary to control those whom they blame for their loss of control. Mind control and other forms of manipulation are particularly dangerous when practiced on the still-developing mind of a child.

Clinical and Forensic Psychologist, Dr. Glenn Ross Caddy, explains the psychology behind the alienator's behavior, their methods of brainwashing and alienating, and the reasons that they must be dealt with specifically as this very particular form of abuser both in and out of the courtroom.