Dads Divorce - Free custody and alimony advice for men and fathers.
Providing essential divorce, alimony, custody and support information and resources to men at any stage of divorce.
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 Question:
My wife wants the divorce and I do not although it certainly has not been a picnic living with her anymore. We have three boys, ages nine to fourteen. Financially, we are very strapped for cash (near bankruptcy) since she has run us into debt with a home remodeling that went 100% over budget. I am the only worker in the household, and she has been a stay-at-home mom for the last sixteen years.
I realize that I am going to be royally screwed in this divorce since she has been in charge of our finances for all these years. I am going to be saddled with "our" debts in addition to child support. Is it better for me to divorce quickly or to work and pay off the debts before officially splitting? Do I use my 401K money to pare down the debt or am I hurting myself even more?
Question:
My spouse is spending her money aggressively to eliminate any cash that she may have to split in our divorce. What can I do to mitigate my obligation to pay half of her debt?
She has served me with a Notice of Dissolution of Marriage, but nothing has been filed yet. I believe she is doing this as a calculated move on her part, re-enforced by her attorney.
Question: My wife and I filed for divorce over a year ago. I was the respondent, and have finished all my paperwork & have not received anything back from the courts. Almost every month she tells me she received the paperwork back and has to pay to have someone help her. I have offered to pay just so we can get this done and she refuses. Finally, I called the court to see where the problem was, and they told me they are waiting for her to finish her part. What can I do to speed this up?
Question: My wife recently admitted to being engaged in an affair with a co-worker who is married with two children. I am very hurt/sad/angry/confused and have begun meeting with a couselor for guidance. My wife has said, "I love you, but I'm not in love with you," and "I don't know if I want to try to save our marriage." I fear that she may be preparing to leave me. My goal is to repair our marriage, but I am worried that, despite my efforts, we may be doomed. She has talked of "remaining friends" and "staying close," as if when we were to split, we would just shake hands, smile, divide up our personal belongings happily, and part ways. I don't see it being that amicable or that simple and am wondering if I should be taking steps to protect myself in case she decides that her affair is not enough torture for me and asks for a divorce. Answer: Be sure to have a good understanding of all of your assets and debts. I would suggest you close out as many credit cards as you can and maybe any joint accounts you have. Suggest marriage counseling, if that is what you want. You did not mention kids. If you have any be sure to stay involved and participate with them in their school and activities.
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