Dads Divorce - Free custody and alimony advice for men and fathers.
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Question: I recently built a new home with my ex-wife to be and we currently owe $155,000.00 or less. The home was appraised for over $250,000.00 six months ago. All furniture and appliances are paid for and still in mint condition. My question is if I allow her to keep everything but my clothes and my vehicle(she has a vehicle also) after committing adultery will still likely be responsible for spousal support and the same amount of child support? Also we signed papers agreeing to 7 & 7 custody on my first week I was stopped by local authorities and my vehicle was searched and towed due to no proof of insurance. I was not charged with anything, however; she has supposedly had custody changed so that i only get supervised visitation. She and her mother are attempting to convince local authorities that I am a drug dealer and they (my previous in-laws) make over one million dollars a year so they are listened to. I am not worried about getting into any trouble because the are false accusations, but I am concerned about her changing custody agreement. I know she is working for her mother and I am sure that they will try to say she makes very little money. Any suggestions? I was trying not to fight about anything and just use one lawyer but I am getting the bad end of the deal. Is adultery worth me attempting to prove? Should I just accept I have no chance of coming out with my clothes? Answer: Allow me to preface my answer to your question with the disclaimer that I am not licensed to practice law in the state of Louisiana. It sounds like you need to get a lawyer. Nothing should be changed in an agreed Order without your consent. Some states find adultery is grounds to get more property or to argue against spousal support.
Question: My wife recently admitted to being engaged in an affair with a co-worker who is married with two children. I am very hurt/sad/angry/confused and have begun meeting with a couselor for guidance. My wife has said, "I love you, but I'm not in love with you," and "I don't know if I want to try to save our marriage." I fear that she may be preparing to leave me. My goal is to repair our marriage, but I am worried that, despite my efforts, we may be doomed. She has talked of "remaining friends" and "staying close," as if when we were to split, we would just shake hands, smile, divide up our personal belongings happily, and part ways. I don't see it being that amicable or that simple and am wondering if I should be taking steps to protect myself in case she decides that her affair is not enough torture for me and asks for a divorce. Answer: Be sure to have a good understanding of all of your assets and debts. I would suggest you close out as many credit cards as you can and maybe any joint accounts you have. Suggest marriage counseling, if that is what you want. You did not mention kids. If you have any be sure to stay involved and participate with them in their school and activities.
Question: My brother is going through a divorce. His wife is bound and determined to take him to court and put on a show with a parade of "witnesses" to publicly humiliate him with claims of an affair. She is actually exacting a type of extortion on my parents and my brother to get him to agree to take all the bills and sell his horses and personal property to give her more money OR ELSE she will take him to court where he will surely lose and be punished by having to pay everything! It's hard to stand up to something when you don't really know how things work in our court system. I understand that affairs or claims of affairs can not adversely affect custody unless it can be shown that it interferes with the ability to parent. But, his soon-to-be-ex-wife wants to saddle him with all the debts and lawyers' fees as a just punishment. And believe me, she could put on quite a show... I think she is a professional victim! She makes more money than he does, and neither one of them makes more than 45,000. Do you have any words of wisdom? Answer: I cannot answer your question specifically to the laws of Texas as I am not licensed in that State. In some jurisdictions, misconduct does not affect any aspect of the divorce. In my jurisdiction, the Court can consider the misconduct of a party when dividing the property and debt. Not all affairs are misconduct. The affair (or other misdeed such as excessive drug use, alcoholism, abuse, etc.) must be shown to have contributed directly to the breakdown of the marriage. Therefore, if a relationship begins after the parties have filed for divorce, it is an affair (as they are still married) but not misconduct. If misconduct is shown, the successful party will get a higher percentage of the net assets. For example, instead of a fifty-fifty split it will be sixty-forty or seventy-thirty.
Question: My wife admitted to having affair along with the person she had the affair with. I also have paper work and receipts as well as other evidence of her affair. Will her infidelity go against her in court? My wife and I were married in the State of Nevada, can I file there or only the state we reside in now? What are the legalities of me having her followed, or even tracked electronically to show how often she is with her affair partner? Answer: First, I must tell you I am not licensed to practice in California. You should always seek the advice of counsel in your state as laws will vary from state to state. Your wife's affair will only be relevant in a divorce action if you live in a fault divorce state. If California is a no-fault state then her infidelity will have no bearing on the divorce or division of assets. You will need to file your divorce where you live not where you were married. Every state will have different requirements for how long you must reside in the state before you can file. Nevada may have a relatively short time frame. If you would like to file in Nevada contact a lawyer in Nevada to determine their residency requirement. Generally, hiring a PI to follow your wife will not be illegal. You should check with an attorney in your state to determine what types of surveillance will be admissible in court. It will not do you any good to have evidence that you cannot use.
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