Worried about the children's future. Options?

Question: I'm from Texas. My husband's ex wife recently told their 18 year old son that he has to move out of her house July 1. He graduates from high school at the end of May. Two weeks earlier, she took away his car, which meant he had to quit his job because he had no way to get to work. She is kicking him out with nothing.

He's not planning on going to college, hasn't even taken his SAT's, how does she think he's going to support himself? Of course I'm sure she wants him to live with us now that her child support will be reduced when he graduates. He has been spoiled and coddled his whole life, and for years my husband has been talking to her about disciplining him, and giving him responsibilities, to no avail, all of a sudden, she's taking everything away.

What concerns me the most is their 11 year old daughter. If she plans on kicking her out at 18, I would like to get custody of her so we can put money away for her college. She has said in the past that she wanted to live with us, but she doesn't want to hurt her mom's feelings... If we could get her to agree to live with us, and her mom fights it, would we have a good case in court considering she kicked her son out? Neither of the kids get along with her new husband. We are willing to not even ask for support from her, as simply not paying child support will save us enough money to send her to private school and set up a college fund.

She doesn't provide the children at her house, anything we don't provide at ours, I even buy most of my step-daughters clothes... I'm just worried about her future. Any advice or insight would be appreciated.

Answer: Based upon the information provided, I do not believe that you have a strong case to modify custody. In most jurisdictions the Court is not going to rely heavily upon the wishes of an 11-year-old child. Further, the fact that the mother asked an adult child to leave the home is not improper. If the child decided not to pursue a college education, it is his responsibility to find a way to support himself after high school.

When your stepdaughter is older your case will improve. The court will listen more to an older child. There is no set age when the child can testify or when the court will abide by the child's wishes. It depends upon the maturity of the child and the reasons that the child would provide on why they want to change custody. If the reasons are good and well presented a court may listen to a 12 year old that advises the court of a logical reason why they want to live with one parent more than a 16 year old that wants to change custody because one parent will let them stay up late.

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