How hard is it to get custody?
Question: I have 3 children from 3 different women. My youngest is the only one I have in my care since me and his mother are married. My oldest, my son, is 9 y.o. and the middle, my daughter, will be 7 y.o. and our son together, the youngest, will be 5 y.o. My 9y.o. son is in Illinois, and we live in Florida. My son's mother lost parental rights for like the 3rd and last time and custody/guardianship was given to her aunt. I'm not on the birth certificate and have never had a paternal test to prove I am the father. I have only had contact with him and the mother's aunt since Sept. 2004, before then, the last time I saw him, he was a toddler. Me and my youngest son drove to Illinois to see/meet him. The aunt who has custody/guardianship wants me to go to Illinois after the current school year to bring him back to live because she thinks he needs "a man in his life". She said we will go to the DCFS office and she'll sign over custody/guardianship. I am just not sure it is so easy? I want this to happen, but what are we going to have to go through to make it happen?
Would DCFS just let me take over so easily, or would there be the need for court proceedings just like a custody case? PLEASE HELP!
P.S. My daughter is another issue. Her mother's mother just contacted me and said she would do whatever she could to help me take my daughter away from her mother, because she is neglectful. I WISH! I don't have the kind of money it would take to go through a custody battle, when again, I have no claim, legallly, to being her father. That will be another chat message...I'm sure.
Answer: I cannot answer your question specifically to the jurisdictions that are present in your question, as I am not licensed in those States. Generally it will be more difficult to get the child from Illinois than described in your question. However, not significantly more difficult than if everything is not contested. You need to file a Petition for Determination of Father-Child Relationship in the appropriate court in Illinois. Have a blood test performed and paternity established. The State Agency would need to be made a party as it appears from the facts provided that they have some jurisdiction over the child. It is likely when paternity is established that they would consent to allow you to have custody. If the mother's rights are terminated and the aunt (the guardian) consents there would not be a contested case. You should start this proceeding immediately as it can take some months to "run through" even a non-contested case. The State Agency may transfer their case to Florida for that State's equivalent agency to review the situation for some months before the order of custody is finalized.
If your daughter is being neglected as indicated by the maternal grandmother, contact the appropriate authorities in that jurisdiction. The other option is to file for custody and see if the mother contests the modification. It is possible that she will not contest the issue if her mother is prepared to testify. If she does contest the issue you can make a determination if you can afford to pursue the issue from there after a minimal financial investment.
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