How to prepare for a custody battle

Question: A friend of mine is trying to gain custody of his 2 kids, needless to say his ex wife is making things very difficult (afraid of losing her tax write offs).

What kind of perparations should be made for the custody "battle". He has records and receipts of things he has purchased for the children, he is in the process of getting his own home, and makes decent money. He also has evidence that since the split there have been slipping grades and behavioral changes with his son and daughter both. Are there any other suggestions you can come up with? PLEASE HELP! He is a very good father!

Thank you for you time!

Answer: In a custody dispute it is often the amount of time that the parent has spent with the children. He should keep a custody calendar or journal of the times he has the children and a small note about what activities he engaged in with the children. He should make sure to attend all school, extracurricular and medical meetings/events concerning the children.

In some jurisdictions the Motion to Modify standard is based upon a two prong test. For example in Missouri the standard is that there has been a substantial and continuing change of circumstances with the children or the custodial parent. The second prong is that because of the changes in circumstances it is in the best interest that the custody arrangment be modified. Here the reduction in the children's grades (if significant) could be a change in circumstances.

As a side note, if the only issue that is holding the ex-wife back from reaching an agreement on the change of custody is the tax exemptions on the children, the father could consider allowing her to keep the deductions. Depending on the amount of the deduction and tax savings each year and the age of the children it maybe better financially to give her the deductions compared to the attorney fees and litigation expenses of the Motion to Modify.

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