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Divorce Advice for Men | Fathers Rights Divorce | Child Custody

Providing men with essential divorce advice, fathers rights divorce information and child custody articles. Dads Divorce is a community for men facing divorce or fathers rights issues and run by Cordell and Cordell. Cordell & Cordell is a family law firm with a focus on men's divorce, child custody and fathers rights divorce.
Dec 08, 2001

Question:

After a very bitter divorce, I agreed to a mediated settlement that grants me joint legal custody of my 1 year old son and expanded standard stair-stepped over the next 1.5 years (when he is 3). As part of the settlement, the ex is required to provide me with proof that she has health insurance on my son. A recent call to his pediatrician worried me when I was informed that my son's most recent check-up had not been done. The ex was required to submit the documentation to me within 30 days. Furthermore, she is required to submit to a random alcohol test which requires her to contact the agency responsible for collecting the urine specimen. Over thirty days have passed and she has not done so. I, on the other hand, continue to follow the order to a "t". I am a member of AA and keep a log of all meetings attended and have given her copies. I have not missed one child support payment. I have not missed one visitation. I have voluntarily gone to co-parenting class. My attorney said that she thinks I will eventually get custody. Should I pursue contempt action on the ex? My goal is to get custody of my son because I really feel that he is much better off with me. Ten months later, my ex- is still living with her parents (she graduated from Princeton and is employable.) She has no job and will not communicate with me in any form, etc. I have hoped she would change. Apparently, she does not care to. My son should be with me. Contempt action, or not? Thanks for your help!

Answer:

A contempt action is plausible at this point. I think you should also ask for a modification based upon her lack of doing the alcohol testing.

Dec 06, 2001

Question:

I am not married but have been in a serious relationship for 3 years. We have a 17 month old daughter. My girlfriend has had a another relationship for the last 6 months she has been with me. She is now trying to be with me once again. All I am interested in is making sure she cannot bring our daughter into something like this again, which she had brought our daughter into these relationships before, and even used her to get the attention of these other guys. I got her to agree to Voluntary Termination of her parental rights. How do I go about taking care of this? I want to jump on the ball before she changes her mind. With this I can still give our family another chance but not have to worry about her making the same decisions and taking out daughter away from me in the process.

Answer:

Allow me to preface my answer to your question with the disclaimer that I am not licensed to practice law in the state of Washington. At this point, you are not the legal father under any Court Order, based upon the information you have provided. With that assumption, I would say that you need to file for Paternity and Custody. Within that action ask that her rights be terminated. Each jurisdiction has very different rules regarding how to terminate parental rights, so I suggest you speak to an attorney immediately.

Nov 07, 2001

Question:

I will start my question with a little background. My husband's ex-wife is the custodial parent of their three children ages 14(boy), 12(girl), and 6(girl). We see them every other weekend from Friday nights to Sunday late afternoons and on Tuesdays from 6-8. His salary grosses $4000 a month. His ex-wife runs a day care out of her home (this scares me!) and does not report her income claiming only $400 a month. He pays $1100 a month in child support and pays for their medical insurance. He also buys the majority of their clothes and shoes. All of this was stated in the divorce decree, so I am not questioning whether or not he should be doing what he is doing. I will mention though that the decree was written and agreed upon when he held a much higher income level. What has prompted this question is the result of the 6 year olds emergency denists appointment. His ex-wife called at 8 o'clock on Monday night (today is Thursday) saying that the 6 year olds tooth was bleeding. The 6 year old has had repeated visits to the dentist (all brought to the appointment and paid for by my husband) due to some fairly major dental issues for a 6 year old. My husband is required to take her to these appointments because she is busy with the "day care kids." (My comment to this is, so someone elses kids are more important than your own. If you can't properly take care of and provide for your children with your current job, then you need to get a new one!) These issues we have been told by the dentist are partly due to lack of care and improper eating habits. Well at the appointment this morning he was told that she has an infection and that it has almost spread to the bone. He is familiar with her case due to frequent visits so he proceeds to explain that if care and medicine isn't taken immediately hospitalization will be required! To help fill in a couple of blanks, we often are asked to buy the 12 year old girl deoderants, toothbrushes, and feminine products because she doesn't have any at home. So I my approximation, the lack of care given to the children runs deep. At what point does this turn in to neglect, or am I just overreacting? Do you have any other advice for the situation? We are in the process of getting the child support ammount reevaluated due to the drastic change in income. We both feel that if we can get the money out of her hands, at least we can make sure that the kids get what they need. At this point, because of what he already sends her way, there is not much left to do the things that she or the kids are requiring/needing. After all is said and done, I would just like to see the children taken care of and the ex-wife held accountable. Thank you for your time and I look forward to hearing from you.

Answer:

Allow me to preface my answer to your question with the disclaimer that I am not licensed to practice law in the state of Indiana. You can file a Motion to Modify the custody and the support. These concerns need to be addressed in that motion. I suggest that you have as much documentation as possible together that addresses the concerns with Mom. The medical, and school records will be helpful. Also what do the children want? Their concerns are relevant as well.

Oct 07, 2001

Question:

My child's Mother has left the state with my child and I have joint custody legal and visitation rights and did all of this without my consent.

Answer:

Allow me to preface my answer to your question with the disclaimer that I am not licensed to practice law in the state of Georgia. You need to get to Court and file a Motion for her to return the children to the State as soon as possible. The longer you wait, it will appear that you acquiesced to the move.

Oct 06, 2001

Question:

My wife left about a month ago and cleaned out all of our joint accounts. I was a widowed man with 2 boys ages 13 and 10 before I married her a year ago. My kids are mine, no adoption was ever done. She left a marriage to come to me and cleaned up in that marriage. She has her own seperate pre-marital money of over $300,000 in her name and I never asked to comingle that. However, what she did do was clean out 2 joint CD accounts totalling about 120k and our joint checking account of nearly 10k. One of the CDs was my children's college funds of $45,000 that had been saved from the their deceased mother's SSA survivor benefits. I'm at a loss here as to what I can get back. I have filed for divorce. She came back for a week at Christmas and then left after New Year's Day. What can I do?

Answer:

I suggest you file a PDL (temporary) Motion to prevent any assets from being spent, acquired, etc. Do so as soon as possible to protect those assets that exist. Also get together all of the documentation showing what has been taken from the banks, etc.

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