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Divorce Advice for Men | Fathers Rights Divorce | Child Custody

Providing men with essential divorce advice, fathers rights divorce information and child custody articles. Dads Divorce is a community for men facing divorce or fathers rights issues and run by Cordell and Cordell. Cordell & Cordell is a family law firm with a focus on men's divorce, child custody and fathers rights divorce.
Oct 08, 2002

Question:

I am married, but verbal fighting between me and my wife have strained the marriage to the point that we are discussing divorce. We have two children, a 3 & an 18-month-old. My wife is from Chile, and has expressed that if we were divorced, that she would take the kids to Chile. She is also always bringing up "divorce." In a recent fight, she said that she knows that it would be illegal for her to take the kids to Chile to live without my consent, but that she would somehow find a way to do so. She has often asked to make a small break in our relationship, where she would take the kids to Chile for a while. In the past I was open to this idea. Now, I am obviously not. My question is this: how can I protect myself from future actions of my wife to take the kids away from me, and more importantly, out of the country. I am not sure that I want to pursue the divorce, but want to make sure that I am not blind-sided by any actions that she may take. Thanks for your attention. J.E.

Answer:

Allow me to preface my answer to your question with the fact that I am not licensed to practice law in Iowa. You need to take these threats very seriously. Generally after the case is decided, the court will not let her move to Chile, unless there is a compelling reason why it would be in your children's best interest to be so far away from you. When you file for divorce, you need to get an injunction that prevents her from removing the children from the area you live in.

Jun 08, 2002

Question:

My boyfriend is in the Marines and recently proposed to me. Right now he is stationed in Hawaii for the next three years. We plan to get married later this year and I would be moving to Hawaii with him. and I was wondering if I had sole custody of my kids can I move them there? Would I be able to do that if I had joint custody. I'm asking about both because my ex and I haven't gone to court yet. Please help with my question.

Answer:

Allow me to preface my answer to your question with the fact that I am not licensed to practice law in West Viginia. It does not matter what your custody is called. It matters if you have the right to solely determine where the children reside, regardless of the location, meaning you can move anywhere with them.

Apr 08, 2002

Question:

My wife and I were married and divorced in the state of Oregon. We all have since moved from Minnesota to our present southern California location. My ex-wife has just taken my (10 yr old) son back to Minnesota, without much warning. She has repeatedly stepped outside the parameters of our divorce papers with no repercussions. Q: Where will I need to contest? CA, OR, MN?

Answer:

I am not licensed in any of the above mentioned states. You need to consult an attorney in your state. Many states have adopted the UCCJEA which governs which state would have jurisdiction in this case. Jurisdiction stays with the state the issues the original orders until another state assumes jurisdiction. The UCCJEA and state law governs when this can happen. Since no parties reside in Oregon, it will likely give up jurisdiction to one of the other 2 states. Which one will depend on the time periods the child has resided in each state. You need to consult an attorney immediately to determine which state has jurisdiction and where you need to proceed.

Apr 08, 2002

Question:

When my ex and I divorced, we agreed on joint legal custody. I'm supposed to pick up my son every other weekend, every-other holiday and so on. But, since I was incarcerated for 16 months, she claims I abandoned my son and to my surprise has her husband pose as his father! My son is only 5 and knows no better. They insist that he call me by my name and the other man is "Daddy". I pay child support faithfully and I am upholding my end of the court order. How do I enforce my visitation rights as stated in the court order, so my son can have a good relationship with me and know who his real father is?

Answer:

Allow me to preface my answer to your question with the fact that I am not licensed to practice law in Georgia. You need to appear per your order for vistitation, let her deny you 2 times and have proof (a witness). Then you can go into court and file a motion to enforce your visitation. The court will be very interested to hear her efforts to alienate your son from you. When you file the enforce you can also file to modify to get more time. However, you will need to be prepared to defend your situation that led you into jail as that will be relevant.

Apr 08, 2002

Question:

I've been married almost ten years and have a 5-year-old girl and a two-year-old son. My wife is diagnosed as bipolar, and she's gotten much worse since our second child was born. She takes her medications and holds down a good job, but is verbally abusive to me and children. Her moods are wildly inconsistent, and despite a tenuous financial situation she spends extravagantly and it pushing us to bankruptcy. I love her, but I can no longer cope with her disease. I fear that growing up in this environment will hurt my children immensely. My wife has suicidal thoughts and in the past, homicidal thoughts toward the children. She has come home from therapy sessions and told me her doctor recommended I lock up or disable firearms in the home. I'm worried that despite the fact she isn't physically abusive, in the midst of a divorce preceding she will become a danger to herself and the children. I understand I would run a good chance at getting primary custody, but wanted any advice you can give on my actual odds. Also, I'm wondering if I were granted primary custody, would I be allowed to move out of state with the children without my wife's consent? Thanks much. Brian

Answer:

Allow me to preface my answer to your question with the fact that I am not licensed to practice law in Colorado. I can not give you odds, no one can. The courts have discretion in determining what is in the best interests of your children with respect to custody. You definitely have a good case considering her instability. I suggest you talk to her doctor, have her sign a release so he can talk to you. His opinion and the records he has kept will be a very important part of your case. Generally it is not considered to be in the children's best interest to live in another state than one of their parents. The court will have to determine if it is in their best interest to be so far from their mom.

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